The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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