Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
