dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
