he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
