I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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