just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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