If i come over, it means nothing
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
