Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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