And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
