He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
