I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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