I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
