what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Randomize
