I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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