Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
