You work out of a Hotel?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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