she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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