Christians are straight up FREAKS
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
