i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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