There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Why are your pants in the freezer?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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