There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
