Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
