If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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