the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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