Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
