OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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