I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
My bed smells like the plague
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
