Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
one two three fourrrrnication!
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize