do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
sex in a hospital.. check
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
