i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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