This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
