My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
