dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
