Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
