Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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