well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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