I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
