If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Randomize
