My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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