no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
