Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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