I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
