So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
