she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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