i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize