Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize