I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
