...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm too high and old for this...
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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