I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
