She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
