Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
my liver is dry heaving
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
