do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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